Restorative Self Care for Grief and Loss

You’ve lost someone close to you and naturally, you are struggling. Caring for yourself is crucial to coping with loss and surviving the overwhelm of day to day life. Self care doesn’t fix grief or lessen grief. Self care simply makes it possible to sit with our grief. Just like if you break your leg, all the things you do to support your leg don’t actually heal the bone. Propping it up, putting it in a cast, using crutches, none of these actually heal the broken bone. However, these acts of comfort provide the support for your leg to heal. The same is true for self care. It won’t heal your grief, but it will create the right environment for restoration. 

When you are grieving an immense loss, in the early days self care can often look like survival. This is the time to focus on sleep, drinking water, taking a long shower, having a good cry, and surrounding yourself with comforting people. As time goes on, you can think of these various self care practices in 5 unique categories: distraction, emotional release, mental challenge, physical movement, and social connection. Here are some ideas to get you started:

Distract- while this is not the best approach long-term, taking your mind off the heaviness of life through a movie, an errand, or a book can temporarily lighten the heavy load of loss. 

Release- releasing your emotions: having a good cry, yell, or laugh. Allowing yourself to experience your feelings helps you to move through them. 

Challenge- writing in your journal, learning a new skill, or saying yes to an opportunity out of your comfort zone leads to intellectual growth and resilience. 

Move- taking the time to move your body, get some fresh air, or simply breathe, can provide a healing relief in the midst of heavy emotions.  

Connect- talking with a friend, attending a support group, or volunteering. Spending time with others and engaging socially allows us to get outside of ourselves and feel connected. 

Now, come up with your own ideas of how to practice the five types of self care:

Distract-

Release- 

Challenge-

Move-

Connect-

If you or someone you know is grieving, we encourage you to take advantage of the individual support we offer through our counseling services.